Quotes

Prue: He doesn't know anybody. It's not like there's a.... fallen Whitelighter support group to join.

Prue: Ok on three. One, two - don't hold my hand. One, two, three!

Prue: Wow obviously somebody needs a Midol

Prue: Would that be the phoebe jeebies?

Prue: Our powers are not toys.



Paige: Why me? . I have nothing against that little ff. fetus!



Paige: You were a demon and a lawyer? Insert joke here.



Piper: I've always been fun Prue; I am just Mrs. Fun now.



Piper: You're my Whitelighter





Piper: Okay. So you summoned me to a cage where my powers don't work so we could all DIE TOGETHER?



Piper: Leo, the baby is an inch long all this arguing is upsetting the mommy.



Phoebe: Flying is awesome...it's the landing part that's a bitch!



Phoebe: Excuse me but I have issues!



Phoebe: Im sorry, is it gang up on Phoebe day and nobody told me?



Phoebe: Be aware of the wrath of Piper



Phoebe: (They hear a noise) what was that?

Prue: Ah, probably a zombie or vampire.

Phoebe: Great, where's Buffy when you need her?



Prue: Some of us have a job.

Phoebe: Some of us have fun.

Piper: Some of us have a really bad hair day.



Piper: Leave it to me to fall for a dead guy.

Phoebe: Its an improvement. At least he wasnt a warlock.



Darryl: Welcome to the lifestyles of the rich a shameless.



Prue: My sisters and I, we have special gifts, ones you cant return.



Phoebe: You want me to keep a secret? Wrong Halliwell.



Phoebe: It could be the upstairs bathroom hogging Prue; it could be the downstairs bathroom hogging Prue, or the sitting in the kitchen hogging all the coffee Prue.



Patty: Cant you just bake cookies with them like all the other grandmothers.



Phoebe; I am not even married and i am already a housewife.



Phoebe; you know how Peter Pan has tinkerbell; they are sort of like that minus the tutu and wings.



Piper: Nothing like a night out on the town after a hard day of demon killing.



Prue: It's the twenty-first century. Its the womens job to save the day.



Piper: Is that why you asked me to marry you in a toilet?



Piper: The tooth fairy is going to come and harass us all for not flossing.



Piper: We're going to vanquish Phoebe's boyfriend? That’s going to cause some problems.



Phoebe: Wouldnt it be nice to save the world at a decent hour?



Piper: Every time I try to freeze, I flame.



Piper: Am I okay? Prue is a dog and Phoebe is a banshee. I am not even in the vicinity of okay.



Phoebe: Why couldnt you get a boy band song stuck in your head like everybody else?



Piper: She doesnt like our clothes.

Natalie: You need outfits there are loose and move. That means no more, braless, strapless and fearless attire.



Prue: Okay but then I have nothing to wear.



Prue: Innocents and alleys. Dont they learn?



Piper: If I could freeze you two I would, often.



Leo: I can orb you because you are my wife, but I am not a cosmic taxi for the whole family.



Paige: What do you say we click our heels and get out of this crazy join?



Leo: Demons you can handle but not rats.



Piper: In the end, all that matters is that you marry the guy you love. If you managed to do that, your wedding was perfect.



Paige: I'm living proof that magic happens when witches and Whitelighters hook up.



Wizard: The Source didnt die; he was reborn into a new sorry ass.



Paige: That needs a serious time out.



Phoebe: Nothing perks up a girl's career like sending her husband straight to hell.



Piper: Every other mother to be doesnt have to worry about her child orbing out to Tahiti when they are sent to their room.



Piper: I am pregnant, not terminal.



Piper: Warlocks we can handle. Demonic ex-husbands we cant.



Cole: I cant go good, I wont go evil, what the hell do you want from me.



Leo: I may be dead, but it still hurts.





Leo: "Excuse me. Can we refrain from blowing up demons in the nursery?

Piper: "Oh honey, it was just one."







Piper: "Honey, sweets, toots, I appreciate that you're very concerned. But I am still a witch, and we do still have innocents to protect and demons to fight. I can't just crawl in a hole."



Piper: "Baby book. My baby book! Oh! Look how squishy I was."

Leo: "You were so adorable."

Piper: "Leo, you can't even see the picture."

Leo: "Well. I'm your Whitelighter. I've been watching you ever since you were a baby."

Piper: "Uh huh, yeah. See, that's too creepy to think about."





(After Phoebe stabbed Cole)

Phoebe: "This is his blood. Blood is not supposed to do that."

Paige: "You stabbed him."

Phoebe: "Yeah."

Paige: "Good."



Leo: "Why am I standing in the ocean?"

Piper: "Phoebe's a mermaid."

Leo: "Oh, well, that would explain it."



Paige: "No offense, but uh... aren't you supposed to be dead?"

Grams: "Oh, I'm over that."



Phoebe: "Grams."

Grams: "In the flesh, so to speak."

Phoebe: "Oh, it's so good to see you."

Phoebe: "Wait. What did I just hug? Where did you get the body from?"

Piper: "Oh, it's a long story. And speaking of stories, a fairy tale just tried to slice our heads off."



Evil Witch: "Well, then, if I'm not the most powerful witch in the land, who is?"

Piper: "Take a wild guess."

Evil Witch: "You. That's not possible. The wolf ate you. I saw it!"

Piper: "Yeah, well, I didn't agree with him. See if this agrees with you."



Phoebe: "Death did us part, Cole. Just because you figured out a way to come back doesn't mean that I didn't keep my end of the bargain."



Piper: "Jeez, you're like my husband with boobs."



Piper: "Ok, vanquish demon first, kill husband later."



Leo: "Shouldn't we concentrate on swapping our powers back?"

Paige: Come on now, Leo. You know how that works. You two are only going to get your powers back once you've learned your lessons."

Piper: "Ugh. I hate that. It's just so very after-school special."



Leo: "I don't know what's wrong with me."

Paige: "Dude, it's the crying thing."

Phoebe: "It's hormones."

Leo: "Really? I just thought that was an excuse."

Phoebe: "Welcome to our world."



Paige: "It's weird talking to a pregnant lady about sex, anyway."

Piper: "Well, um... Paige, how do you think I got pregnant?"





Phoebe: "Wow. That was weird"

Paige: "Yeah.Lets do it again"

Phoebe: "Okay, just give me a second for my organs to catch up"



Piper: "Cole problems?"

Phoebe: "What? No, he's soul-searching somewhere, or off searching for a soul."



Paige: "Ugh! Oh gross! What are you guys watching? Is that some horror movie?

Piper: "No, it's 'The Joys of Home Birthing'. Strangely, I'm not feeling the joy."



Piper: "Wow, prenatal yoga this morning, and now you want to crash a stranger's funeral? You really do need friends."

Paige: "You're mean."



Piper: "Phoebe's baby was a demon, ours is an angel, for crying out loud!"



Piper: "A rebound romance burns fast and hot like a shooting star and leaves the re-bounder blind to the flameout ahead."

Phoebe: "Who wrote that psycho babble?"

Paige: "That would be from the 'Ask Phoebe' column."



Phoebe: "And why is everyone else trying to make a bigger deal out of it than it is?"

Piper: "Probably because we're following our instincts and not our hormones.

Phoebe: Ouch."



Piper: "Ok, so we're going back. What if it takes us too far back?"

Leo: "Well, we could wind up with tails."



Piper: "I don't need to resort to maternity clothes. Everything is just so bright and cheery and ruffly. This thing makes me look like a."

Store Clerk: "Adorable! Absolutely adorable! I think it's you."

Piper: "Hmm I guess you don't know me very well, do you?"



Piper: "Look, do you have anything that would go with combat boots? You know, something for the mom-to-be who kicks some ass upon occasion? You know, something in black or gray?"

Store Clerk: "I'll check."



Leo: "I think you look beautiful."

Piper: "How long have you been standing there?"

Leo: "A minute or two."

Piper: "Well, that's just not fair. You're not allowed to orb in unless I'm completely aware of it."

Leo: "Sorry, I was mesmerized."



Phoebe: "Next time? What happened to you, Cole?"

Cole: "Me? Well I've gone mad."



Piper: "Third demon in a row that I've killed with my new power but whose counting?"



Phoebe: "Who is that?"

Piper: "She's a."

Leo: "A fellow Whitelighter, see I finished your sentence."

Piper: "That wasn't what I was going to say."



(Pipers in the bathroom waiting for the results of her pregnancy test)


Piper: "I'm almost done."

Prue: "Define almost."

Piper: "Just give me a minute...or two."

Prue: "Are you positive?"

Piper: (Whispering) "I hope not."

Prue: "Piper I cant be late today."

Piper: "Neither can I."



Piper: ''Barbara or Oprah? We'll go with Oprah. Barbara makes you cry."



Piper: "You were at Cole's...all night?"

Phoebe: "Uh huh"

Piper: "Did you?"

Phoebe: "Uh huh!"

Piper: "Was he?"

Phoebe: "Uh huh!!!"

Leo: "Could we talk about this later?"



Cole: "We got to stop seeing each other. Why? Cause I got to kill you that's why...smooth"



Piper: "Come on Phoebe, Trolls, Fairies, you don't believe in that stuff."

Phoebe: "Why not?"

Piper: "Well, maybe its time we told her about Santa."

Prue: "Now youre going to go and have a good time young lady."

Piper: "Your not the boss of me."

Prue: "Oh I am to."



Phoebe: "Well he's gone for now, I think we should take advantage of that."



Cole: "Why Miss. Halliwell are you trying to seduce me."

Phoebe: "Always."

Piper: "Eww."



Paige: "A warlock is that like a demon?"

Piper: "Pretty much, yeah."

Paige: "Isn't that nice."



Cole: "I still know the terrain."

Phoebe: "You just might find yourself in everlasting pain."

Paige: "That's a rhyme."

Phoebe: "Yeah Im sorry, now's not the time."



Paige: "A demon that likes to kill witches. Well, that narrows it down to about every page in the book."



Piper: "Paige, dont make me the wicked witch of the northwest. I didnt ask for this big sister gig. And frankly, it sucks. But since Im on a roll you should get rid of that lollipop habit because its going to rot your teeth."



Paige: "Next up, some powdered toadstool. BAM! Lets kick it up a notch. "

Leo: "Whoa, what are you doing?"

Paige: "You know, just preparing for The Source. "

Leo: "Oh, is he coming over for dinner?"



Paige: "I dont know exactly why Im here. Im just kind of having a hard time being surrounded by people and."

Phoebe: "And not being able to tell them you can move things with your mind?"

Paige: "Doesnt exactly roll off the tongue."



Paige: "Did you find the spell yet?"

Phoebe: "No, but I found the demons. Oh my God"

Paige: "What? You cant say demons followed by Oh my God. Im new at this, Im likely to panic."



Piper: "The freaking furniture just attacked!"



Leo: "Well, we don't have time for you to lose it."

Piper: "Well too bad because Im going to lose it whether we have time or not!"



Leo: "Uh-oh."

Piper: "What? Oh no. No-no-no-no-no. You can't leave right now, okay pretend you're, and pretend you're out."

Leo: "I can't do that."

Piper: "Yes you can, come on."

Leo: "I've got to go."

Piper: "Leo you can't go right now okay. We've been in this line for two and a half freaking' hours (BANG - clock blows up) Uh-oh."



Leo: "Is Whitelighter my occupation or should I just put guardian angel?"

Piper: "Hi how are you doing? What's the matter with you?"

Leo: "We shouldn't be here Piper, this is wrong."

Piper: "Wanting a normal life is not wrong, okay. Couldn't be any more right for crying out loud; stop being so good all the time. Newlyweds, first fight, eyes front."

Leo: "Piper."

Piper: "Look Leo I love you, but Im getting a migraine here, okay? Just, look, we're not hurting anyone, we're not breaking any commandments, okay? We just changed a lousy two to a lousy seven. So let it go before I blow!"



Clay: "It's really good to see you. (They hug and Phoebe has a premonition of her and Clay in bed together. The premonition ends and Phoebe smiles. They stop hugging.) You okay?"

Phoebe: "Uh huh. Ooh."



Piper: "Alright, that's enough, get out of my kitchen before my cooks overheat."



Prue: "Piss Off thumper."



Piper: "Well, if my sisters dont figure you out and destroy you, my boyfriend Tom will."



Piper: "No more obeying the rules, considering the consequences, none of that crap."



Cole: "Phoebe, if what I found out is true, Prue's in serious trouble. She's been forced to marry a warlock."

Phoebe: "Figures that bitch would steal Piper's thunder."



Cole: "Got to hold my hand."

Prue: "This already sucks."



Phoebe: "Well, don't get mad at me, I've been shot."



Cole: "You know, it wouldn't kill you to be nice to me."

Prue: "Really. It's funny you should say that, considering how many times you actually tried to kill me."



Phoebe: "Piper, you have to stay positive. You know what? I have Celine Dion 'Behind The Music' on videocassette. Would you like to watch that?"

Piper: "Would you like to get slapped?"



Piper: "You know, I was thinking. This lamp is not worth fighting over, so if you love it then I love it."

Leo: "Yeah?"

Piper: "Yeah, I mean, uh, life's too short. (They kiss. Leo knocks the table the lamp was on and it smashes on the floor.) Ooh! Wow. Now I love it even more."



Phoebe: "Wait a minute. Life altering plans can not be squeezed in between 'pass the newspaper' and 'who ate the Special K?



Warlock: "And whose fault is that? Wait a minute; do you think I'm an idiot?

You've got something up your sleeve."

Phoebe: "Hello? Sleeveless."



Prue: "Yeah. Speaking of, where's Piper?"

Leo: "Uh, she's at the manor recovering from a little problem we had at the passport office."

Prue: "What problem?"

Leo: "Uh, well, she sort of blew some of it up."



Prue: "Uh, okay, was it a demon?"

Piper: "No, it was watermelon!"

Phoebe: "Honey, why did you vanquish watermelon?"



Piper: "So what am I going to tell him? The last time I saw him he handed me proof that you were killed in 1942. Hes going to expect a reaction from me."

Phoebe: "How about "Hey Dan, you're right, I am a necrophiliac."



Phoebe: "Flying's awesome, it's the landing part that's a bitch."



Leo: "Ours will be doubly magical. Half-Whitelighter, half-witch."

Paige: "Hey, that's like me. Oh, you might have some trouble."

Paige: "Whoa! Full frontal Phoebe.

Cole: "She just flashed."

Paige: "Yeah, I got that."



Piper: "Pheebs, friendly little tip, lay off the hairspray. There's a fire starter in the house."



Phoebe: "Oh you know me, any excuse to spend a little extra time in the kitchen."

Piper: "Yes, I do know you. And thats just not true."



Piper: "I always preferred quiet men. They make good listeners."

Leo: "What's that, dear?"



Paige: "She's like "Piper Light" - all of the personality with none of those messy emotions."



Wizard: "You're the touchy one aren't you? I've heard about you. Peeper?"

Piper: "Piper."



Phoebe: "I can't believe what you almost saw in that hotel room. If you had gotten there five minutes earlier--"

Piper: "La la la la la! Over-sharing!"



Cole: "You have to believe me Phoebe. I forgot what it was like to be human, to feel, to care. Then I met you."



Piper: "We kicked Shax ass. We bad."



Piper: "Don't put me in the middle."

Prue: "I'm not. You were born in the middle."



Prue: "Well, look on the bright side at least you've got new powers, I mean you've been bitching about it for long enough.."

Piper: "Yeah well be careful what you bitch for."



Prue: "There is nothing in the book. Why do only lame witches precede us?"

Piper: "Because nobody is as good as you Prue."



Piper: "Care for some bubbly?"



Cole: "Honey what are you doing?"

Phoebe: "Uh, Im cleaning."

Cole: "You don't clean. You hate cleaning."

Phoebe: "I know. But its better than falling apart isn't it?"



Piper: "Paige, The Charmed Ones come first!"

Phoebe: "The Charmed Ones come first?"

Piper: "It always worked better when Prue said it."



Piper; "Ok, you saved my life, so I guess we're even on the Book of Shadows swipe. Paige, there are rules to being a witch. Rules you going to have to learn to follow."

Paige: "Not to be difficult but. Youre married to a Whitelighter and Phoebes shacked up with a demon, so maybe, on my balance my friend could stay cute?"

Piper: "Okay."



Paige's Boss: "My, my, my...that pile looks the same size as it did an hour ago."

Piper: "Oh, that was my fault, I distracted her with muffins."

Boss: "Who are you."

Piper; "I'm her. Sister."



Phoebe: "I was just..uh.."

Piper: "Opening a can of whoopass!'



Piper: "Bad date?"

Prue: "No, not at all. It was great. You know dinner, movie, sex."

Piper: "On the first date? You sleaze!"



Prue: "Yeah, I kicked ass!"

Cole: "No, you kicked air."



Prue: "Yeah, yeah. I'll just run up to the altar room, which by the way is right next to the potions lab and Ill be right back."



Prue: "Do we have to save him?"

Piper: "He's pissing me off!"





Phoebe: "So while Piper's romping around the clouds with Leo we've got our Wiccan butts flapping round in the wind here. I mean we are very lucky Prue that we haven't been attacked yet."



Phoebe: "Stairs can be sobering?"

Prue: "Yeah well, what was I supposed to say? That some unknown demon came into our attic to steal our magic book and then little Trolls came and pushed us down the stairs?"



Phoebe: "Smart people don't do stupid things, Stupid people do."



Piper: "Prue slept with Andy!"

Phoebe: "Hello!"

Prue: Thanks a lot, mouth."



Prue: "So we're agreed? Twenty minutes?"

Piper; "Prue, you can't do a party in twenty minutes."

Prue: "Watch me."

Phoebe: "Prue's party tips. Meet, greet and bail."

Piper: "Stop it."

Phoebe: "My sentiments exactly, stop hinting around and ask him out already!

Give him some of your crabs."

Piper: "Don't be disgusting!"



Piper: "Leo?"

Phoebe: "Frozen. Quick, have your way with him!"

Piper: "Do you ever stop?"





Piper: "I can't believe we got arrested for kidnapping ourselves."

Prue: "Yeah well, it should make for a pretty interesting defense."



Piper: "Prue, we're not just stuck in jail, we're stuck in the past."

Prue: "Yes Piper, Ive been following."



Phoebe: "Piper it was an accident. Its not like I borrowed Prue's car so I could drive it into a pole!"





Piper: "Leo, you obviously don't have sisters! One minute you're arguing about something and then suddenly you're arguing about who stole who's Malibu Barbie in 1979!



Piper: "When a demon makes a house call, my curiosity gets piqued."



Piper: "The man you admire is Richard Simmons?"



Piper: "Uh, is there nothing I can say to turn you off?"



Piper: "I just say it because it's ridiculous to make two pots of coffee when you're the only one who drinks diesel."



Piper: "Alright, I'm only doing this for you and if I get killed, I'm going to haunt the both of you forever."



Piper: "Whoa, hey, hi, almost decapitated."



Phoebe: "Shhh..don't even say it."

Piper: "The Thirteenth, there I said it and nothing happened."

(Bullets start shooting through the house and the girls scream and run - Prue and Phoebe behind the couch and Piper behind a table)

Phoebe: "I told you not to say it!"

Piper: "Oh, so this is my fault."



Leo: "Being with her broke the rules. Not being with her breaks my heart."



Piper: "No Ive moved past upset and right to pissed off. You tricked us and now there's a warlock who wants to turn us into witch-kebabs!"



Victor: "You know what I could probably get used to having a Whitelighter as a son-in-law." (Cole comes down the stairs)

Cole: "Everyone having fun down here?"

Leo: "Where do you stand on demons??"



Piper: "Aggh..that tastes like ass....phalt."



Phoebe: "Prue? You're not going to wear that are you? Didn't think so, we'll meet you in the car."



Phoebe: "Is the ghost toast?"



Phoebe: "Old McPiper had a farm ei-ei-oo."

Piper: "Did I just hear a moo? Phoebe fix this."



Jack: "Hey. How's my favorites auctionette?"

Prue: "Fine. How's my favorite auction-ass?"



Little Prue: "That's my doll."

Little Piper: "No it isn't you gave it to me."

Little Prue: "No I didn't you stole it."

Prue: "Thats true you did steal it."

Piper: "I did not."

Prue: "Yes you did."

(Little Prue uses her powers to take the doll off Little Piper)

Piper: "Hey, thats not fair!"



Little Prue (To Prue): "You're pretty."

Prue: "So are you."

Piper: "Oh, give me a break."



Phoebe: "Assistant District Attorney, we have to stop meeting like this."

Cole: "You better be careful or a guy might think he's being followed."

Piper: "You'd better be careful or a girl might think her sister is getting a really cheesy pick-up line."



Leo: "Piper this is completely illegal."

Piper: "Yeah, well so is marrying a dead guy lets not get technical now."



Natalie: "The objective is to..."

Piper: "To WIN!!"

Natalie: "NO."

Piper: "Nooo.."



Piper: "Well...its been a while since, you know, I-I was a little nervous and I kind of kept freezing him."

Prue: "Piper you didn't."

Piper: "I didn't mean to, the first time."



Phoebe: "Wow, Leo, you lost your mum's ring. It's a good thing you're dead already."

Leo: "I had it in my pocket, Piper. All the orbing in and out..."

Piper: "Your orbs are grass if you do not find that ring."



Prue: "You know that television show where...there's that woman who's an angel and she helps strangers every week."

Allison: "I love that show."

Prue: "Don't get too excited Im nothing like that."



Phoebe: "Hey, I forgot your question."

Piper: "I asked if Prue would have sex with someone other than herself this year."

Phoebe: "Thats disgusting...please say yes."



Prue: "Don't you think youre over reacting? We're perfectly safe here?"

Piper: "Don't say that. In horror movies the one who says that is always the next to die."



Phoebe: "Your single, your responsible and way overdue in the sex department. I say go for it."

Piper: "I'm not way over due. Ok, maybe just a little bit."



(About Jenny's sex project)

Piper: "I have plenty of experience."

Dan: "With sex?"

Piper: "Uh, no...Just talking about it."



Piper: "I'd rather just freeze him and kick him in the..."



Dan: "Don't you have some other house to repair?"

Leo: "No."



Phoebe: "Hey, you know you can ask me anything you want about being a witch."

Darryl: "No thanks."

Phoebe: "Its actually really cool. We have this book, its called the book of shadows."

Darryl: "Too much information Phoebe."

Phoebe: "No but its.."

Darryl: "Nothing I want to know, Im serious. I don't want to know about anything."

Phoebe: "C'mon. You don't even want to know if we fly or anything like that?"

Darryl: "I don't even want to know if you own a damn broom, a skillet, a cauldron, a dust buster. I don't give a damn."



Piper: "I remember what Phoebe was a baby it was hard on mum and with you dropping her all the time.."

Phoebe: "WHAT?!"

Prue: "Uh..um..gotta go."





Phoebe: "Here I am talking about the shortage of perfect men and in orbs yours."

Piper: "I found one of the good guys."

Leo: "Unfortunately, Im here to talk about the bad guys."

Phoebe: "No shortage of those!"



Andy: "I was nowhere near the neighborhood. Thought Id stop by.."



Melinda: "How do you keep your legs warm?"

Prue: "We drink coffee."



Piper: "Sabotage, Im being sabotaged!"



Rodriguez: "Prue is a witch."

Andy: "You wait here Ill go and warn the Wizard of Oz!"



Leo: "Piper. I look at you and I think how lucky I am. I mean I can't stop looking at you. Youre my dream come true. Youre my Rays Amedetra. Every time I see you I love you even more. You're so beautiful. You're so special. I can't imagine my life without you." (Piper walks in)

Leo: "Piper?"

Piper: "Leo, who are you talking to?"

Leo: "Oh, nobody. Just myself you know.."

Piper: "You were telling yourself how much you love you?"



Piper: "Kit, leave that alone!"

Phoebe: "Bad Kitty."

(Owl morphs into naked man)

Prue: "Good Kitty!"

Piper: "What are we supposed to do now?"

Phoebe: "Kill innocents?"



Phoebe: "I hope this doesn't effect my virginity."



Prue: "I'm going to win this fight and save your ass so I can kick it myself later."



Prue: "Why is Phoebe going to school without her book?"

Piper: "Why is Prue not answering Piper's questions?"



Natalie: "Ok, lets pretend Im the enemy."

Prue: "Ok, that is way too easy!"



Leo: "If you want to freeze me in bed for your own sexual pleasures thats fine."



Phoebe: "Prue, if you keep on ignoring me my feelings might actually implode."



Piper: "He's still staring at me."

Phoebe: "Who?"

Piper: The guy at the end of the bar."

Phoebe: "Oh no honey, thats called flirting

Piper: "You say tomato.."

Phoebe: "No, I say relaxo!"



Piper: "I'm being stalked by psycho killers and I hide in the shower?!"



Piper: "Ok, that didn't work but my legs still do..run!"



Piper: "I'm a super powerful witch who's engaged to a Whitelighter, saving the world from evil on a daily friggin 'basis and all these people are going to see is a pitiful loser who still lives at home with her sisters and her unemployed boyfriend!"



Piper: "If I move forward Ill be sliced and diced!"



Phoebe: "And we didn't even have to get naked."



Phoebe: "Don't worry, we had safe sex, a lot of safe sex!"



Piper: "No, wait, Ive got buns in the oven!"



Piper: "Phoebe, don't act blonde."



Phoebe: "But your going to die, oh, that didn't come out right."



Prue: "We could rely on our vicious guard cat to protect us or we could remember to lock the door!"



Piper: "All that vanquishing, think of the wear and tear!"



Prue: "Hey that was an antique you assho-"

Phoebe: "He's very sensitive about the language."



Phoebe: "Go away horny Tom-cats!"



Piper: "How does it feel to be a man now?"

(Piper after she knees the snake in the groin)



Piper: "I don't know, Im a romantic comedy girl. Why go to the horror movies when they come to us?!"



Phoebe: "Oh this coming from the only Halliwell that actually likes earthquakes."

Prue: "I don't like them, but I just don't go running through the house naked screaming 'Run For Your Lives!' either."

Phoebe: "Ok, that is such an exaggeration. I was wearing slippers!"



Prue: What was it in High School that the guys started calling you after they caught you making out with someone under the bleachers?"

Phoebe: "Its not going to work."

Prue: "What was that? Oh yeah!! Freebie!!"





(Thinking)

Prue: Great, we're surrounded by Warlocks

Piper: Yeah, and next time get your own damn lipstick

Prue: I heard that!

Piper: I love you

Prue: Bite me

Phoebe: "Where's Prue?"

Piper: "Way overdue, she's assuming the identity of a hit woman."

Phoebe: "What?!"

Piper: "And guess what, she's got a new power - she can astral project now."

Phoebe: "Are you kidding me?"

Piper: "Nope."

Phoebe: "Are you kidding me?"

Piper: "Nope."

Phoebe: "I hate her."

Piper: "I know."

Prue: "You can either take off your pants or Ill do it by force."





Leo: "Ever done it on a cloud?"

Phoebe: "I don't know does a featherbed count?"



Piper: "Ok, what ass-backwards spell did you guys cast?"



(After seeing Leo naked in the shower)

Prue: "Leo?!"

Leo: "Prue?!"

(Piper walks in)

Prue: "Nice Orbs."

Piper: "Prue? Leo?! Ok get out of here..sicko."





Piper: "Not good, not good, not good. Flee! We're not in Kansas any more!"



Prue: "So whats our level of confidence in this plan?"

Phoebe: "Well on a scale of one to ten, ten being we whoop ass, one being he laughs at us while we're on fire and naked."

Piper: "Maybe you should lie to me."



Phoebe: "I never had breasts back then."

Piper: Phoebe, you've always had breasts."



Phoebe: Guess what! My ethics professor kicked me out of class!"

Prue: "What? Why, what happened?"

Phoebe: "Well, I don't know. One minute Im telling him why my paper was late and the next thing I knew I was...unzipping his pants with my teeth."

Prue: "Oh Phoebe. You do know that charming the pants off someone is just a figure of speech?"



Phoebe: "Pride? You don't seem that different

Prue: "Oh really? Well right back at ya!"



Prue: "Piper froze ya!"

Natalie: "She..she what?"

Prue: "Yup!" (she grins)



Evil Piper: "What the hell kind of witch needs her sisters to vanquish a demon?"

Piper: "What the hell kind of demon has a panic attack when her boyfriend comes to visit?"



Piper: "I just feel like Dan got the short end of the stick."

Prue: There are so many ways I can go with that but I think Ill just.."

Piper: "Thank you."



Prue: "Yeah, well the house is a mess again. I mean why can't we take on the demon of cleanliness or the demon of house keeping or even that big bald guy Mr Clean, I would so totally take him on."



Phoebe: "Uh, once you finish your thing and I finish my thing, we really need to go to meet Piper and Leo to fix the thing at the.."

Prue: "Thing."

Phoebe: "Exactl..I love you."



Rex: "Prue, your um..sister is here to see you. She's waiting in your office."

Prue: Which sister?"

Rex: "The one that upon seeing your office said 'Damn I should go back to College."

Prue: "Phoebe."



Piper: "Thats easy for you to say, you'll never have to greet your husband with 'Honey I froze the kids."

Prue: "No, I just accidentally moved them to another zip code."

Phoebe: "But I will see them, find them and bring them back safely."



Piper: "Phoebe, work? On no, no, no she's probably at her gay and lesbian group right now."



Phoebe: "Piper, what do you think of your boss?"

Piper: "I think he's a self-serving jerk who must have a very small penis!"



Piper: "I believe she pronounced it 'WOOGYman' or was it just the buck teeth?"



Piper: "Don't worry. I can handle this all by myself! Its me, the culinary packaderm."





Prue: "I feel like I should be cackling!"



Piper: "Phoebe, you didn't kill anyone."

Phoebe: "I could feel his body shake uncontrollably beneath mine."

Piper: "Ok, now your making me feel sick!"



Prue: "You know, you two should be ashamed of yourselves! Thats for thinking you'd get away with it. And thats for thinking you wouldn't get slapped!"



Phoebe: "Hey Leo? Do you think you can make yourself look like Brad Pitt?"



Piper: "Leo, I was a chef. I can't make chips and dip!"



Phoebe: "Oh look who it is.."

Piper: "Good Morning."

Phoebe: "Hi, do you recognize that person?

Prue: "Yeah, she looks vaguely familiar, kind of like a sister we used to have, what was her name?"

Phoebe/Prue: "Puh, Puh, P...Pippie? Pipper?"



Jack: "Can I take you out for dinner?"

Prue: "I don't think so." Jack: "Come on, let me buy you a drink."

Prue: "I don't think so."

Jack: "Well can I at least get my phone back?"

Prue: "I don't think so."



Piper: "Who else would want to kill us?"

Phoebe: "Well, you were a little sharp to the mailman yesterday and we all know how testy they can be!"



Dan: "I want you to move in with me."

Piper: "Huh?"

Dan: "At least until the permanent windows are installed. If its your sisters your worried about they can move in too. Since Jenny moved back with her folks, there's just, plenty of room."

Piper: "Uh, I don't know if thats such a great idea, some of us don't wear pajamas."